As a matter of fact, it was in playing the game “Indecent Proposal” that they first became aware of their built-in conflict. They both realized that they wouldn’t be jealous if their spouse had an extramarital heterosexual affair, but would be quite envious about a homosexual affair. Considering why this was so led to a series of shocks and insights. I neither encouraged nor discouraged their homosexuality; however, I recognized that it was the only way in which either might have an authentic sex or love life.
Homosexuality (like other forms of alternate sexual orientation) is rarely changeable. My theories about this are in line with classical psychoanalytical concepts, which hold that sexual orientation is conditioned during the “stage of discovery”— between two and three years of age, which is when children discover the differences in sexual anatomy between boys and girls. How parents respond to the child’s sexual discovery and curiosity, what kind of sexuality they themselves model, and how the parents and siblings relate to the particular child, all have an impact on sexual orientation. There may be personality traits that predispose a child toward a homosexual orientation, but I believe that the family environment is the most crucial factor.
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